Friday, February 12, 2010

Presenting Myself


After two years of considering myself "on medical leave" from public life, I have returned to the classroom as a student to hopefully successfully finish up my Master of Theological Studies degree.

I have ALWAYS been self conscious and insecure about how I present myself to others, and what others perceive of me.  Before you all go commenting about how WONDERFUL I am ;) I know this.  If you were to ask me to tell you honestly how I felt about myself I would give myself glowing recommendations.  I think I'm honest about my strength, weaknesses, and flaws.  But this doesn't make the anxiety about others perceptions any better.

Over the years I've gathered bits and pieces of what I can from what others would say about me on their first (second, third) impressions.  It's a bit amusing, and I'm kind of wondering if you all agree with this depiction of myself.
  • in high school a boy broke up with me because I was "too bubbly" this was not his real reason, but the one he gave me. I am since glad that relationship did not last very long.
  • a friend I knew through band festivals in high school once told me that he thought I was intimidating for guys because I was so confident about myself and (especially high school guys) people were not use to that.
  • a college professor told me in conversation about discussions inside and outside of the classroom that sometimes I'm right on, and some times I say things that are very irrelevant.
  • during recruiting for my sorority in college a sister said that when she was going through recruitment she thought I was scary.
  • several people have told me that they thought that I hated them before they go to know me.
So I don't know.  Honestly, I think I'm too much to handle for some people.  I'm a people person (with insecurity issues, I know right!), I'm energetic and I tell it like it is.  I don't have a problem with being honest, and sometimes I over share.

As I'm trying to pull my life into some kind of academic, professional, future order how I present myself is going to become important to me.  Mostly I would like to form a career upon being me and assisting organizations and individuals in the things that I am passionate about.  Tell me what your perception of me is... for real, go ahead, click the comment button.  I think I'm awesome so you won't hurt my feelings. :)

3 comments:

Renee said...

Hey
This is great! And I am so happy you are able to go back to school!
Congrats!!

Penny Reid said...

Here are just a few things I appreciate(admire) about you Chrissy -your commitment to your faith, your concern for the environment, your honesty, your amazing gift for photography, your sense of humor. Hope this helps with what you are looking for. Love and hugs, Penny

Display Name Alpha said...

As an odd happenstance of mental synnergy... I am piloting my ass in gear to get into school...

I am aiming for the closest thing with a description of "Forensic Journalism" I can come across.