Sunday, October 08, 2006

I want you all to know what it feels like

Lately I've been having issues. I am young, married, and do not have children. For some reason this seems to be a lonely place to be. Ryan and I have alot of friends, mostly married, mostly with children. We see our friends on a fairly regular basis in the comings and goings of everyday campus life. However, actually spending time with these friends is next to impossible. If you invite them to do something, they can't because of the kids, and if they are making plans to do something, it's usually with other couples who have kids. So, therefore Ryan and I are stuck with nothing to do. I love these friends, but I don't think they understand what they are doing. Leaving Ryan and I out of their lives, simply because we do not have children.

On the other hand, our single friends, who when making plans with their other single friends do not invite their married friends along...these friends will come over when invited, but you have to be able to find them to invite them anywhere, they are usually already out with other single people. Again we love these friends, but it's hard to spend any time with them.

So, Ryan and I make our own plans and go about on our own life, without any real life friends. When we are around our apartment or do get to talk to people we are referred to as "anti-social" but it's hard to be social when noone ever invites you anywhere. Come on people. This all just really sucks for us. And I want you for once to know what it feels like.


Shelly said...

If I were there I would absolutely invite you everywhere. I know its hard. I have seen both ends of it..the married end and now the single end. You come to realize who your true friends are. Know that I love you BOTH ( a little more!!) and I will always be here for you!!

Becca said...

You know that you and Ryan are always welcome to come and hang with Matt and me. I know it's a drive but maybe one Saturday when neither Matt or I have drill you can come and we can all do something fun!

Matt said...

Chrissy - you are exactly right. Whenever someone gets married I'm happy for them (most times.;-) ) But then again it absolutley DOES mean they are less available. I don't care what anyone says.

What I dread is when good friends who are married begin having 2 or 3 children... Then it'll become "Oh hi, yeah, we should definitely get together sometime." Right, like in 18 years...

It is good though our friends are decent enough to love their kids enough to pay attention to them. :-) We can't be too selfish right?

Marinda said...

Awww, Chrissy, I feel so awful now that I have read your blog. Before Brian and I moved to campus we felt exactly the same way. We were married with kids, and all our friends were single, so we felt left out because we weren't invited anywhere. I never thought you and Ryan would feel the same way here, surrounded by so many families. I hope Brian and I haven't upset you in any way, because we really enjoy hanging out with you guys. If we did, I am so sorry.

Anyway, we need to make plans sometime to do something without the kids. Are you still up for bowling sometime, because I would love to do that!